Okay, stock futures are up. Big deal. It's Sunday night, and the robots are doing their thing. Dow up 107 points? That's like finding a dollar in your couch cushions. It ain't gonna change your life.
Supreme Court Shenanigans & Tariff Wars
Let's talk about something that actually matters: the Supreme Court hearing on Trump's tariff power. IEEPA, blah, blah, blah. It all boils down to this: Can the guy slap tariffs on anything he wants just because he feels like it? Lower courts said no. But Treasury Secretary Scott Bessent is "optimistic." Of course, he is. He's gotta toe the line. Stock futures climb as investors await Supreme Court showdown on Trump tariffs and shareholder vote on Musk's $1 trillion pay package - Fortune And this whole thing about China's rare earths? Give me a break. It's just another excuse to start a trade war. We're supposed to believe this is about national security, not just good old-fashioned protectionism? Seriously? But wait, are we really supposed to believe the patent office is staffed with superheroes who know everything?
Elon's Trillion-Dollar Fantasy
Then there's Elon and his trillion-dollar compensation package. This is where things get truly absurd. Tesla shareholders get to vote on whether to give this dude enough money to buy a small country. Chairwoman Robyn Denholm is out there begging people to approve it, saying Tesla will "lose value" and Musk might "leave." Seriously? He's holding the company hostage!
Musk himself says it's about maintaining influence over Tesla's "robot army." A robot army? Is he serious? Is this guy running a car company or writing a sci-fi novel? It's all about delivering 20 million vehicles and 1 million robotaxis. Sounds like a PowerPoint presentation from a Bond villain, offcourse.
Elections, Data Dumps, and Oil Spills
Oh, and don't forget the elections in New York City, New Jersey, and Virginia. Supposedly, they could break the government shutdown deadlock. Yeah, right. Politicians actually solving problems? I'll believe it when I see it.
We've also got the usual economic data dumps coming this week: manufacturing index, payroll reports, services index. Numbers, numbers, numbers. They'll spin it however they want, regardless of what's actually happening on Main Street.
And while all this is going on, the yield on the 10-year Treasury is doing its thing, the dollar's bouncing around, gold's dipping, and oil's creeping up. OPEC+ is "pausing" production increases. Whatever that means. It's all just noise designed to distract you from the fact that the system is rigged.
So, What's the Real Story?
Look, I'm not saying the sky is falling. But I am saying that these little blips of "good news" are meaningless in the grand scheme of things. The underlying problems are still there: political gridlock, corporate greed, and a whole lot of delusion. So, enjoy your Sunday night rally, but don't expect it to last.